• First off, I'm pointing out that the notion women only want certain kinds of men is flawed. Every one of them is different and wants different things. If you make yourself a good prospect, you'll get interest.

• We all have shortcomings, find ways to compensate. If you have a sense of humor, lean into that. Be kind and considerate. Learn to be good listener and do household chores. Learn to dance. Whatever you can think of.

• If "conventionally beautiful" women aren't attracted to you, don't focus on looks. Shed the notion of ideal weight. Don't focus on bra size. When someone sets you up on a blind date with their friend who has "a great personality," go into it with enthusiasm — beauty fades, breasts sag, weight gain is normal, and so on. But a great personalty can last a lifetime.

The guys I'm talking to judge women on superficial characteristics (usually looks) but then complain when women do the same in reverse.

I suspect that a considerate, thoughtful guy who listens to women, makes his dates laugh, can cook, does his share of the housework and childcare, and looks past surface beauty will draw a crowd.